Course content – PF23-Deeskalation
The modules of this course – work through them in order.
7. Module 7 · Nonverbal De-escalation
De-escalating with the body
Alongside language (Module 6), nonverbal de-escalation – through body language, presence and space – is of great importance; the nonverbal level often has a stronger effect than the words. In a tense situation the person perceives your body language very precisely, often unconsciously. A calm, open, non-threatening presence de-escalates; a threatening, superior or hurried one escalates. The key principles are: a calm, open posture – relaxed, no crossed arms, no threatening gestures or fists; calm, slow movements – nothing jerky that could startle; visible, open hands – open palms signal ‘no threat’, so not in your pockets, behind your back or clenched; eye contact without staring – attentive and calm, never a fixed, challenging stare; a calm, friendly facial expression; and attention to space and distance.
Space and distance are particularly important. Keep an appropriate distance: too much closeness feels threatening, escalates and endangers your own safety – an upset person needs room. Do not push the person into a corner or a confined space, as this creates panic and resistance; leave both of you a way out. Do not tower over the person or block their way – where possible, be at eye level. And keep your own escape route free (Module 9). Together with verbal de-escalation, this signals ‘no threat, calm, safety’ (NICE, 2015).
Learning objectives of this module
- You know the principles of nonverbal de-escalation.
- You present yourself calmly, openly and non-threateningly.
- You keep an appropriate distance and space.
- You do not push the person into a corner and you heed your own safety.
Giving space, avoiding threat
Two related principles deserve a closer look: giving space and avoiding threat. Both de-escalate, and both protect your safety. An upset person has an increased need for space and reacts sensitively to closeness. Stepping into their personal space or crowding them feels threatening and can lead to panic, resistance or aggression. So keep an appropriate, rather larger distance, do not move in on the person while agitation is high, and leave them freedom of movement and a way out. Distance also gives you time to react if an attack occurs (Module 9).
Avoiding threat means avoiding anything that looks superior or dominant: towering over the person, a wide dominant stance, crossed arms, a pointing finger, fists, sweeping or jerky movements, blocking the way, staring. Several staff members approaching at once can also feel like a show of force. Help may be needed for safety, but the presence should not be needlessly threatening; ideally one person leads the conversation (NICE, 2015). Instead, choose a calm, open posture, as far as possible at eye level, with open hands, calm movements and a calm face. If you lower yourself to eye level, for example next to a seated person, make sure you can still stand up and step back quickly. Never put yourself in a corner or without an escape route (Module 9).
Nonverbal de-escalation
| Element | De-escalating |
|---|---|
| Posture | Calm, open, not threatening, at eye level |
| Hands/movements | Visible, open; calm, slow |
| Gaze/facial expression | Attentive (no staring), calm and friendly |
| Space/distance | Appropriate, not crowding/confining (+ safety) |
Table: Elements of nonverbal de-escalation. Source: own illustration, AI-assisted.
Congruence of verbal and nonverbal de-escalation
De-escalation works best when the verbal and nonverbal levels agree (congruence) and send the same message. If they contradict each other – calming words, but tense body language or an irritable tone – the message seems implausible. The nonverbal level is usually perceived more strongly and ‘wins’: someone who says ‘Stay calm, I want to help you’ while appearing hurried, tense or crowding the person is experienced as a threat, and the de-escalation fails. Effective de-escalation therefore needs calm words, listening and acknowledging feelings (Module 6) and calm, open body language at an appropriate distance (Module 7) – both saying ‘calm, no threat, understanding, help’.
The basis of congruence is inner calm (Module 5). Only someone who is calm inside comes across as authentically calm, because inner tension shows in the body and the voice. The tone of voice (the paraverbal level) also has to fit: calm, warm and friendly, not irritable, loud, curt or condescending. In practice, pay attention to all levels – not just the right words – and keep working on your inner calm.
The right distance
Mr K. is highly agitated, clenches his fists and shouts. An inexperienced staff member steps close to him to ‘calm him down’ – Mr K. feels threatened and escalates further. An experienced colleague does it differently. She keeps a rather larger distance, stands calmly and openly with visible hands and slow movements, and speaks calmly and with understanding. She does not crowd Mr K., leaves him space and a way out, and keeps her own escape route free. Mr K. no longer feels threatened and gradually calms down.
Calm words, tense body. Another day, Mr K. is agitated again. A staff member says “Calm down, everything is fine”, but she stands in the doorway with her arms crossed, keeps looking at the clock, and her voice sounds sharp. Mr K. hears the words but sees a blocked exit and impatience. He tries to push past her to the door, and she is pushed against the door frame.
How to classify it: The words were calming, the body language was not – and the nonverbal message won. Standing in the doorway blocked Mr K.’s way out and at the same time cut off her own escape route. Better: step out of the doorway while keeping her own exit in reach, uncross the arms, speak more slowly and leave Mr K. room. The incident should be documented and discussed in the team.
| Aspect | Case study: experienced colleague | Version B: incongruent |
|---|---|---|
| Distance | rather larger, no crowding | blocks the doorway |
| Posture and hands | open, hands visible, slow movements | arms crossed, looks at the clock |
| Tone of voice | calm and understanding | sharp, impatient |
| Way out | free for Mr K. and for her | blocked for both |
| Outcome | Mr K. gradually calms down | pushing, risk of injury |
Table: Comparison of the two versions of the case. Source: own illustration, AI-assisted.
Exercise: In tense situations, do you pay attention to your body language – calm, open, not threatening? Do you keep an appropriate distance and avoid crowding? Do your words, tone of voice and body language fit together? Is your inner calm the basis?
Show suggested approach
Observe yourself in your next shift, or ask a trusted colleague to give you feedback. Check four points: 1. Posture – open or closed (crossed arms, hands in pockets)? 2. Distance – do you step closer when someone is upset? 3. Position in the room – where are the door and your own way out? 4. Tone of voice – does it match your words?
Choose one point to work on deliberately, for example: “When someone is agitated, I first take a step back and make sure that both of us have a free way out.” You can also practise posture and distance in pairs during a team meeting.
- Body language often has a stronger effect than words: a calm, open, non-threatening presence de-escalates.
- Give space: keep an appropriate distance, do not crowd or corner the person, and leave a way out for both of you.
- Avoid threat: no towering, pointing, fists, staring or show of force – ideally one person leads the conversation.
- Words, tone of voice and body language must send the same message; inner calm is the basis.
Self-reflection (voluntary)
Voluntary · not assessed – your thoughts are not saved or evaluated. Think about each question first, then open the prompt.
1. What does your body usually do when you feel under pressure?
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2. In which rooms of your workplace could a person feel cornered – or could you?
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3. When did your words and your body language last tell different stories?
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References for this module
Deutsche Gesellschaft für Psychiatrie und Psychotherapie, Psychosomatik und Nervenheilkunde (DGPPN). (2026). S3-Leitlinie Verhinderung von Zwang: Prävention und Therapie aggressiven Verhaltens bei Erwachsenen [S3 guideline: Avoiding coercion – prevention and treatment of aggressive behaviour in adults] (Version 3.0, AWMF register no. 038-022). https://register.awmf.org/de/leitlinien/detail/038-022
National Institute for Health and Care Excellence. (2015). Violence and aggression: Short-term management in mental health, health and community settings (NICE guideline NG10). https://www.nice.org.uk/guidance/ng10